I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
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I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
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Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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