My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
