Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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