hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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