That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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