I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Randomize
