we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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