Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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