Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
