If you die in college, do you die in real life?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize