she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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