It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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