so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
