Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize