Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
let's call it "werewolfing"
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba