I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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