Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
