what if every blade of grass was a penis?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
