I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
