Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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