so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
