There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
