The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize
