He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
