i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
