I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
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