I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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