"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
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