is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
