I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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