Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Can you bring me the toilet please
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
