Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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