Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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