did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
