i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
