The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
