the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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