never play flip cup with pint glasses
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize