i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
