I want to stick my p in your. b.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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