Her vagina should come with caution tape.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
