would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
