i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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