hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
