i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
