Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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