Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
