if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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