love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
