I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
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