my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize