Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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